It was a beautiful summer day, I had recently moved to California and my kids were invited to a birthday party. The sun was strong but at Stevens Park there was a bit of a chill. The sun couldn’t reach me through the thick trees.
I remember the boys were excited. I found the party hostess. She had a sort of cold presence next to me. I had met her only once before, but it was unmemorable. I thanked her for the invite, commented on the weather and when her kids ran up, introduced them to each other.
I watched excitement grow in the eyes and in the entire being of my kids. My older son (experienced in birthday parties) quickly eyed the food, the presents, the goody bags. My younger son, oblivious to all that lay around him, was just excited to get playing.
Her two kids and my kids ran off to play. Although my eyes bore holes in the backs of my kids, I said, “They are all so beautiful!”
“It’s because of that blonde hair and blue eyes.”
Hmmm, I looked at my kids, did I mention I’m African American? My kids have black and brown hair. Their skin and eye color are almost the same description. Huh?! I thought, my kids don’t have blonde-hair and blue…
Oh she’s talking about her own kids.
Who says that to another parent?
Your kids aren’t as beautiful as mine? Is that what she just said to me?
As it turns out, we all say it. We look at kids, photos, videos, blogs, posts and respond, “Beautiful!” Leaving others to question, who is not beautiful?
I hear all the time, mixed kids are so beautiful– so does that mean unmixed kids are not?
I was hurt by this woman. I think no matter what, we must always be aware of the things we say and spout out when we are not thinking.
(due to an abundance of spam, we’ve had to turn off comments here, but please head over to our Facebook page – we’d love to hear and share your thoughts there! facebook.com/MixedRootsStories)
By: April 2014 Guest Blogger – June Snow
June Snow is a mom of two wonderful kids – Blaise & Miles – and is also the Race Director, along with Rusty Snow, of the Santa Barbara International Veterans Day Marathon. Her family is from Belize and she grew up in Cambridge, MA.